Twas the Night...

The Background: The "MOB" was discussing what we thought Gary would wear on the November 29th (1997) QVC Boyds Show, since he normally wears some type of a costume. About this same time, Gary was being bashed for being "obnoxious" (LOL) and an anonymous post commented that he should be dressed as an "ass". Being loyal as we are, we took this off-color comment and "went to town" with it. In a flash, we had him decked out in Texas Duds...complete with Wranglers (to show "it" off), belt buckle, boots, chewing tobacco...you name it! And this is what led to....

Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a critter was stirrin'
Not even Gouda Mouse.

The Boyds' stockings were hung
On the chimney with care
In hopes that St. Nicholas
Would bring a new bear.

The Edmunds and Matthews
Were snug in their places
The Emilys and Baileys
Had smiles on their faces.

DH in his bear cap
And I in my teddy
Had just settled in bed
'Cuz we were tired, already!

When downstairs by the chimney
There arose such a chatter
I drug my tush outta bed
To see what was the matter.

I crept down the stairs
Groped for the light
Flipped on the switch
Oh my...what a sight!

What to my "putered" eyes
Did appear????
But a funny little elf man
With a cute little rear!

His dress was unusual
But a Texan wouldn't mock it
Some tight Wranglers he wore
With a faded ring on the hip pocket.

His belt was pure gold
His spurs were fantastic
(But his white beard was fake
I had spotted the elastic!)

Who was this intruder?
Wait...this rearside I'd seen...
I knew at that moment
It was the HEAD BEAN!

His lively little helpers
Down the chimney they came
And he shouted, gave orders
And called them by name.

On Rufus, On Wilson
On Camille du Bear
On Walton, On Ewell...
Would someboyde puuuleeeeze fix Zack's unruly hair!!!!

These helpers...they listened
And followed HB's commands
They'd heard quite too often
What they couldn't find with both hands.

They placed all the stuff
Round the Boyds Christmas tree
Some new bearstones for DH
And some new plushes for me.

They worked oh so quickly
And soon they were done
The HB was right in there
Enjoyin' the fun.

He snapped twice his fingers
And gave his moustache a twitch
Then up the chimney they 'rose
Without even a hitch.

I heard HB mumblin'
As he got to the roof
'Bout some QVC viewers
Who thought him uncouth.

I ran to the window
And looked up to the sky
Heard plenty of snickerin'
As I saw them fly by.

The bright light of the moon
Seemed unnatural...but why?
Then I realized the reason...
OH, GARY...MY, MY!!!!!

Wearin' my moonglasses.....Brenda

Now if you REALLY have a sense of humor, click to see the graphic. But I'm forewarning you...it isn't "PG". ( | )